Melor was home for the week-end. We were both seated at the dining table, each engrossed in our respective note-books. Then she let out a long sigh.
Zendra: Apa ni mengeluh macam orang hilang panduan?
Melor: Mieee, your blog ni, poyo lah.
Zendra: Poyo? I don’t understand. What do you mean? All this new-fangled terms are lost on me.
Melor: It means …... susah nak cakap lah ………… like you want to be classy but people can see you are kampong people.
Zendra: Itu orang…. But blog? Hey orang kampong now very sophisticated, you know. Don’t demean people OK?
Melor: You copy-paste , copy-paste only. People want to read what you write when you blog. Some more it looks loud, gawdy ……. poyo lah
Zendra: Alaa give me time-lah. My blog only 1 week old. Start out loud - OK maa, like the creation of the universe ……….BIG BANG!
Anyway, I don’t know how to write.
Melor: Last time when you were working, you were forever typing -typing until ayam berkokok……. Couldn’t stay up with you pun.
Zendra: That wasn’t writing. Those were boring reports ler. RFP, RFQ, evaluations, letters …… I don’t know how to write like “once upon a time, bla, bla,bla….. bla, bla, bla”
Melor(rolls eyes): Mie, can we go to Ajidon for mee rebus. Teringin lah….
Zendra: K. That’s the best thing you’ve said since you opened your mouth just now.
While getting ready, Zendra reminisces back to a day decades ago -
Boss: Zendy. Come.
Zendra: Yes, Boss.
Boss: Nah. Take this back and re-do.
Zendra: Mmmmm, What’s the problem, Boss?
Boss: Your report is very long-winded. You go round the world east-west north-south and round again before you arrive at your conclusion. Even that not clear. What they teach you in university I don’t know.
Boss: Some more your words bombastic, even Oxford professor don’t understand. Bahasa Arab pun ada.
Zendra: Bombastic? Arab?
Boss: Ni. Ubi tikus, albait. Albait tu maknanya “rumah itu”, tau?
Zendra: (Laa, ubiquitous …… albeit) Sorry.
Boss: You re-write that and follow the KISS principle.
Boss: Keep it simple simple. I have to present it, not you. OK? I want it tomorrow.
If I could narrate those 2 episodes, I would, but I can't. The one with my boss left me creatively-challenged until today. But then, maybe I could write a movie script or a Malaysian drama.
Hmmm ……..that’s a thought …….. Maybe, maybe ........(angan-angan lagi)
(Sorry, can't get the tabbing to work)