"It tastes exquisite - like a beautiful woman coming out of the darkness"
What a pick-up line for a man appreciating his loved one's culinary creation.
Emmm, if you think this came from someone who had a birthday recently, sorry-lah. Sorry for me too. But then when he piles on another helping of rice even it is only to go with fried chicken and kailan masak lemak and sambal belacan tomato, that's enough thanks for me.
Anyway that line was from a cookery show I was watching. When there's no one else at home watching MTV, or ESPN or CNN then I get to watch the cookery channel...... while having brunch.
Why brunch? Well I woke up quite late.
Why did I wake up late? Well I went to bed very late, 4.00 am.
Why 4.00 am? Because I couldn't sleep.
Why not? I had Milo tarik kurang manis at the mamak's at Mydin Mall at 10.30 last night. So you know lah, minum Milo jadi KUAT dan SIHAT - not jahat ok?
Why drink a stimulant at night lah? Because my taitai sis belanja mah...
Why she belanja? You see, we were with another sister (I have 4 sisters) shopping for prizes for our once-in-a-few-years gathering of the Tok Jamal descendants this weekend. Tok Jamal was our great-grandfather. This taitai sis is really generous - she always belanja us makan-minum.
And then she assigned me a task - younger sisters always get assigned little tasks, and not so little tasks.
What task? "You take home these prizes and gift-wrap them" she ordered, "after all you got nothing to do!"
You know I'm really amazed. A retired madam taitai, living in a 3-storey mansion with 3 whatchamacallems in the porch and a maid for each of the 3 storeys, tells ME who chose not to have a maid, who everyday AT THE VERY LEAST has to make the conjugal bed (this is easy), cook and serve the conjugal dinner (also easy but sometimes no mood), wash and put away the utensils (easy too but boring job), also hang out and then fold and put away the family laundry (do not need a degree for these), occasionally wash the bathroom, and whine about the uncut grass, the leaky roof, - hey I'm not complaining - but I do NOT have nothing to do, madam.
"Eeeyer, YOU'RE the one got nothing to do what!" I sneered.
The Libran sis with 2 grandkids on her hands every working day, tries to balance the scales "You both divide the things up lah or you both come to my house to do the wrapping".
"Aiyahh susah-susah I'll take everything-lah". Attagirl, sis. You're an angel. Mmmmuah. Tomorrow I can watch TV while eating my brunch, kikiki.....
Plus think about the poco-poco steps easy enough for the makciks to pick up during the joget lambak segment - a task assigned by the Libran. Can't get off scot free, you know.
Actually the things I do everyday, is what next-doors' maids do everyday too. OK, I concede I only do what I choose to do. But then I'm unpaid so I can choose to DO something or NOT to do something. Why get stressed mowing the grass, cleaning the drains? I'm stressed enough just looking at them lah. (That sounds like convoluted logic) But I must say the cars are always shining - enough elbow grease in that department haha. Not from my elbows but someone elses. Of course if I were a maid like the ones next door, the grass, the drains, my car would get lashings of grease from mine.
Hats off to the Indon maids, those who work hard from dawn to dark, and especially those who do not layan banglas and construction workers. Here's a song for them. (I myself get stressed watching it - Thanks Widz)
(Sigh - I just want to be like that beautiful woman coming out of the darkness........... How to be this I do not know. Would these latest gifts from a Canuck Casanova help?)
This was written tongue-in-cheek - no malice intended, absolutely